Healthpharmablog. About Health & Medicine

The young couple in the parked car struggled so not only because they didn’t have a place for sex or a way to be safely comfortable and communicate sexually, but also because they had learned well the wrong lessons of sex. Ironically, this young couple’s struggle was similar in many ways to sexual struggles within marriage. They didn’t have their own place, they couldn’t find privacy, they didn’t talk about sex, they didn’t work as a team. They were trying to do sex to each other or for each other, not with each other, and they were victims of the same genital focus I have discussed throughout this book.

Here is a list of the twelve erotic errors that have served as the sexual lesson plan for the first three perspectives of sexuality.

1. Sex is an impulse. It is the strongest, the most difficult to control of all human impulses.

2. If you start touching erotic zones, it is difficult to turn back, to control the “sexual impulse,” the gravity of sexual drive pulling us helplessly toward intercourse.

3. “Foreplay” is a preset collection of guaranteed sexual maneuvers that must be learned primarily by boys to get girls ready for sex.

4. Boys are always ready for sex, always want it, will do it with almost any girl if they have the chance. Anything less than constant sexual urgency is less than manly. A quote by Emo Philips illustrates this focus. “My schoolmates would make love to anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself.” So goes the “folk myth” of sex in the school years.

5. Good girls don’t want sex. Bad girls may want it, so boys should have it with them and then find a good girl to marry. Good girls need a lot of “foreplay,” so boys, who are never bad for wanting sex and are “queer” if they don’t, should practice their technique on bad girls.

6. Everything you do sexually is for intercourse. Intercourse is the best, most adult thing in the whole world.

7. “Playing around” with hugging and kissing is fun, but if you don’t finally “go all the way,” you aren’t grown up and you may end up hurting yourself.

8. Sex is natural and simple. Anybody can do it. You don’t have to learn how to “make out,” you just have to let yourself go.

9. You had better use contraception and always have it ready. It takes away I from the “real thing,” but you have to have it ready, because once you I start “playing around,” you will lose control and always want to “go all I the way.”

10. If you are really deeply in love, you will want to have intercourse. If you I are a girl, intercourse means love, so if you have done “it,” you are I probably in love. If you are a bad girl, and just like sex for fun, feelings, I and closeness, you can have a lot of sex and never been in love. Intercourse I is something good girls try to save and give later as a marital gift. Bad I girls might trade intercourse too soon and for too little.

11. If you are a boy and in love, you will know just what to do to please your I girlfriend. You will magically know, through love, every secret turn-on. I Love is so strong that it makes sex remarkable.

12. Your parents would never understand about your sexual feelings. They are f older, times were different for them, and they just want to tell you about [ not doing it or contraception, sperm, and eggs. Nobody tells their parents what they really do or would want to do sexually. Old people don’t have the same sex feelings as young people, if they have any left at all.

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You can’t tell me that ejaculation isn’t orgasm. This is just a bunch of crap, some type of psychobabble. You come or you don’t. I don’t want to hear any more about this stuff. It is just crap.

HUSBAND AT SESSION ONE

I never would have thought it. It seems so obvious now. How could I ever have thought that ejaculating was the same as really enjoying sex? This is remarkable. I can see that psychasm is not a gimmick. It’s real. You have orgasms and psychasms, it’s just obvious. But I can’t convince my friends. Now they think I’m crazy, like I bought some new sexual mantra.

SAME HUSBAND AT FIVE-YEAR POLLOW-UP

The danger in discussing the difference between ejaculation and orgasm is that the earlier perspectives on sexuality are so firmly established in our society. The mere suggestion of psychasm sounds like the worst of pop psychology, like some strange throwback to a psychology of the past. The Masters and Johnson position is clear and dominates our thinking. They write, “Orgasm refers specifically to the sudden rhythmic muscular contractions in the pelvic region and elsewhere in the body that effectively release accumulated sexual tension.” Kinsey reported orgasms without ejaculation, but was referring to the same contraction concept, and he reported it only in young boys, sexually immature persons. Masters and Johnson state, “Ejaculation without orgasm . . . can occur in certain cases of neurological illness.” They clearly feel that ejaculation is orgasm in the male.

I suggest that ejaculation and pelvic muscular contractions are “orgasm,” organ-based, and that more generalized emotional, cognitive, and body response is “psychasm.” Men are capable of both, separately and simultaneously, and understanding this capacity in men is important not only for super marital sex but for other health-related issues.

Women can emit a fluid during sexual response that may come from the Skene’s glands along the urethra. Women do not typically define their orgasmic experience by this fluid release, but for men, “the fluid is the fun.” Fear, anxiety, and joy can all result in ejaculation, so it is a response that is typically but not exclusively related to sexual stimulation.

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We will discuss only natural detoxification methods here. By natural I mean methods of assisting and/or enhancing the natural cleansing mechanisms the body already uses every day .

Let us consider some of the organs which are responsible for the excretion of the toxic waste from our body, and see how we can assist in this process.,

Lungs. All our blood passes through the net of blood vessels in the lungs and is oxygenated. This process provides oxygen, necessary to the process of extracting energy from our food. Using this oxygen our body is able to oxygenate (burn) food as well as toxins. Excretion is achieved by exhaling carbon dioxide together with other (sometimes quite aromatic) gases. How can we assist ? Surely lots of clean fresh air would make a difference. Improved breathing techniques could also help. According to the teachings of yoga our breathing should be quite slow and contain four distinct phases: slow inhaling, a wait period, slow exhaling and another wait period. For some people it happens so naturally, that they do not pay attention to it. However it is possible to acquire bad habits, in which case some breathing exercises may help. For instructions regarding breathing technique, look up the books “The oxygen breakthrough” or

“Oxygen therapies” or read a book about yoga.

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